My dog Max rarely ever sleeps in the bed with me. Every once in awhile he'll jump up in the morning and plop down at the foot of the bed, but he's not really a snuggling kind of guy. Or so I thought!
I've been traveling quite a bit lately and when I do, Max hops in the black car with me early in the morning and we pop across town to my best friend's place. Her husband and seven-year-old daughter greet me and Max at the side walk and off they go. He never looks back. On the one hand, I'm happy he's okay with me leaving. On the other, I'm thinking, "Wait a minute. Won't you miss me?"
I typically call nightly to check on Max and see how he's doing and if he's missing me at all. So the other night, I make my ritualistic phone call and Karyn answers the phone. We make a little idle chit chat and then I get straight to the point . . . "how's Max?" I ask. To which she replies . . . "He's great. Curled up next to me in the bed sound asleep."
I'm thinking, "what the f**k!" My dog is sleeping with another woman! Suddenly, I'm feeling the pain of Sandra Bullock, Elin Woods and Elizabeth Edwards all rolled up into one big ball of hurt! Max, I discover, is not only sleeping with someone else, he's actually been doing this for years!
At my house, he typically sleeps by my bedroom door. At their house, he sleeps smack in between the two of them. What's that all about?
I, of course, discussed this with my vet and she surmised that Max likely isn't comfortable sleeping in my bed because in my house, he has a job -- to protect me -- thus why he sleeps by the door. At my friend's house, the job of protection is left to Karyn's husband and therefore Max can relax and sleep where he likes. And that he does.
So, here's what I have to say. Sandra, Elin and Elizabeth . . . your husbands really weren't cheating on you when they starting sleeping with other women. To the contrary. They were actually protecting you.
Nice work if you can get it.
Once a dog. Always a dog.
